Lovers whisper secrets only they two can hear.
“Wouldn’t you rather have a deep, passionate relationship than something that feels more like friendship? Life is too short to live a single moment without passion — especially in your relationship.”
– Tony Robbins
The Ancient Greeks called it Ludus — the feeling of infatuation in the early days of romance. Ah, those sweet moments when your stomach flutters at the sight of new love and every second spent apart feels like internal torture. Falling in love is one of life’s greatest pleasures. After all, it is love that forms the basis of our humanity and influences our lives from the moment we are born. But hands down, the best part of those first stages in a relationship has to be the lust that accompanies our every waking hour.
Like most of us, those curious Ancient Greeks were smitten by love. Their fascination in the devotion department motivated them enough to spend time studying love in all its forms. The Greek God of fertility proved to be the inspiration behind what the Ancient Greeks called Eros — the realm of love encompassing desire, fire and passion.
Now we’re getting somewhere.
Long days filled with intense yearning between bouts of time spent ensnared in erotic flashes of the night before — daydreams of the moments when a thin layer of sweat was all that separated you and your lover. You know what I’m talking about it. Those sensually shaded days where you exist in a constant state of arousal. He is all you can think about; all you want to think about.
The moments when the need to release sexual energy becomes your driving thought are the same moments you are certain you’ve stepped straight out of a scene from Basic Instinct. Minus the ice pick.
Wait — keep the ice pick. You might need it.
Burn, baby, burn.
That statement can be considered somewhat tame when my second husband swept into my life to change everything I thought I knew about passion. Late nights involving lips and tongues, black lace, delicious fingers … rock hard parts between hot wet places.
Lovers whisper secrets only they two can hear. Bodies entangle to become a river; hips move faster than a runaway train. Nothing is forbidden. Long held fantasies become your reality.
The sexual tension between us was intoxicating. Seldom could we refrain from keeping our hands to ourselves when out in public. We used to fuck everywhere — the dark corners in a club; the lady’s bathroom; shopfront doorways; shady parks and front seats of cars. We even did it on the neighbor’s front porch late one night.
Whaaat? I hear you cry. She was the neighbor from hell. This was fun payback.
When you are in the throes of a hedonistic realm where the pursuit of sexual pleasure becomes your primary focus, nothing is taboo. Nothing is off limits. Love doesn’t know limits or boundaries. Love only knows expression.
From the moment Risky Business erupted onto my screen, I wanted to have sex on a train. You remember the scene — hot passionate kisses; locked eyes while having sensual sex in a dimly lit and empty carriage on a fast-moving train.
Exciting. Steamy. Carnal.
Anyone want to take a train ride? After that scene, I am certain trains across the world knew more than just the average commuter. Perhaps this was the driving force behind the exercise to install security cameras on every carriage. Who needs to watch choreographed porn when you can get real-life action on late night train rides?
It was on. The evening arrived and one of the most erotic acts I have ever experienced preceded the train-sex, becoming part of a long-winded evening of foreplay. We were out in a crowded bar listening to a band and enjoying a few drinks. Knee-high boots worn with sheer pantyhose beneath a short skirt doesn’t make for easy access when in public.
He locked his eyes on mine and slipped his hand between my thighs, lightly rubbing me with the back of his fingers before he pulled away and brought his fingers beneath his nose, inhaling. Body heat. Groan. My hormones went into overdrive watching that simple act play out. I blushed beneath the immediate rush of arousal. Someone flag a train; I was in need. Desperate need.
The carriage wasn’t as nearly as dark or as empty as the Risky Business train scene, but business went ahead regardless. How could it not after the above-mentioned prologue?
It was bright; starkly bright and it didn’t take long to figure out we had to maneuver our way around the pantyhose tucked in a high pair of leathers.
He got creative; slipping my panties and hose down until they bunched at the top of my boots before dropping to his knees and crawling up between my legs. He was essentially ensnared between boots, hose and thighs with no way out but onward. Some might call that a pussy-trap. He might have been inclined to agree. Either way, he was hard and I was ready, and he proceeded forth while the train sped west and a few folks lingered in the back of the carriage pretending not to notice.
Risky Business eat your heart out. Somewhat. Because we didn’t manage to reach that slowed-down climatic filming achieved in the movie. I didn’t feel like Rebecca De Mornay — despite the security cameras rolling overhead and particularly when it was over and I came back up for air, spotting cheesy grins flashing from the back of the carriage.
The Ancient Greeks didn’t necessarily think that Eros was always a good thing. They believed this kind of love to be dangerous and likely to burn out quickly unless supported with one of the less superficial loves. I cannot help but agree. Eventually those heated, first stage relationship days tend to ebb into a different vibration — committed love.
Something like what the Ancient Greeks dubbed Pragma. A hallmark of healthy, long-term relationships. Pragma is about giving love — patience, tolerance and compromise — essential elements for a successful long-term relationship.
Still, I believe that passion is a super important component to any relationship. It is that initial burn of lust and desire that serves to fuel the love and begins to form the groundwork of the connection. Passion becomes the foundation upon which intimacy and deep love are born and nurtured, and love is the motivating law of life.
U.S Andersen expresses this perfectly when he said: “The universe dances and sings and buds and blooms and builds. All of life clings to one another, serves one another in a great common purpose. Love pervades all, love is behind all, love is the great goal. Sex is life expressing love!”
Even love on a train. Especially love on a train.